What, you think I wasn't paying attention this month?

The great ASL bandwagon denotes me as

In my mid-twenties
Unquestionably male (shut up about the hair)
Behind a desk


U2R:
> and shouryu-hiten-ha random people too???

Ah, now THERE'S a blast from the past.  Heh.


Laura in El Paso writes:
> Location-el paso tx (the closest thing that ever came here to an
> anime convention was a star-trek convention....u.u)

*points and laughs*  Ha!  You're in El Paso!

*remembers that El Paso has Chico's Tacos, and Las Cruces does not*
Damn!  You lucky little...


Mike Birdman decides to waste our time:
> hey hey hey i can type hey 3 times in a row WOW im so special. anyways
> who is it jill chris(dork) barry wesker rebecca nemesis(he counts)
> sherry ect...also i think if ranma showed affection twards akane then
> dumped her she would climb the school clock tower with a mauser rifle
> and well yeah
*SNIP*

*a 1970 Dodge 440 engine is dropped into a pillowcase just as a Walther
P99 is drawn and a katana is pulled from a scabbard (yes, this requires
three hands...don't ask*

Okay, this kid has got to--

*Shour is tackled by Fritz and Hiroshin*
"He's new...give him a chance!"

*Shour complies begrudgingly*
(Does anyone else remember when the basic concepts of punctuation and
capitalization were taught in public schools?  Damn, I miss those days. I
dub the Generation after Generations X and Y...Generation AOL.)

Colin informs us:
> Name:  Colin Keefe
> Occupation:  Software Tester, Doublebyte characters, Japanese
> Teacher
> Location:  Richmond, KY
> Age:  26
> Joined:  April, `96
> Affiliated with:  WoS (Co-Leader), EOE, GSFLGL

It is also most important to note that Colin is THE MAN!


Birdman:
> or a agma pervert baseball and whack that letcher outta the park for the
> most coveted PANTY CUP!!! ok i gotta go remember I LOVE JILL VALENTINE!

*pillowcase containing Dodge engine is readied...Shour is tackled again*


Laura is mistaken for writing this...but she didn't:
>anyone else out there that looks similar to an anime
>character, and I'm not just talking about Ranma 1/2,
>here.

Ah...the great Walski/Ukyo affair.  It WAS Walski, wasn't it?  The girl in
the copy room who looked exactly like Ukyo?  Any of you crusty ol' guys
recall?


Derrick Lin (Wetnose):
> I guess I can't contend for youngest anymore...but hey there, 15 year
> old girls. How ya doing? Wanna get together sometime? ^_^

Oh please...this is almost as bad as the 13 year olds on CollegeClub.com
chatting with the 25 year olds, just hoping to seduce
one...really...someplace else...PLEASE.

(Hey, I serve my share of spam, but this is...ugh...please...this is not
a bar...)

> And lastly....what is the cheapest way for a High
> School teenager (without a car) to be able to watch
> anime? I am penniless and do not, unfortunately, have
> high speed internet access. ARRRGH...

Rentals.  (Comic book/CCG/Role Play type shops are a good source for
rentals...usually better than national franchises like Hastings or
Blockbuster.)


H-K:
> ... but didn't "Akane to Remember" happen before Nodoka's intro?
> ::scratches head in perplexion:: Ah well... ::shrugs:: I guess I'll
> just start reading the series over again. Do something enjoyable while
> not going crazy. ^_^

Nope nope...Nodoka is introduced in the early 20s, I believe, and the
Ryuganzawa arc happens in 25/26.  At least, IIRC.


Wiz:
> Again this is my opinion, you all have yours, I have mine.

Well, it may very well be your opinion that the Sun rotates around the
Earth, but it doesn't make you right.

> I have mine. Im not bitching at you for what you believe and I expect
> the same.

You don't say.

> No, thats horse shit. . .You can define it all you want to with dumb
> interpretations of the dictionary but a martial art is something
> where you use your hands and feet to attack and defend.

You're not what at who for what who believes and expecting what?

How does one...interpret the dictionary?  I mean, the dictionary,
especially authoritative dictionaries like Merriam-Webster make it pretty
concise without any need for "interpretation."  This isn't a Scorcese
flick we're talking about here.

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines it:
Main Entry: martial art
Function: noun
Date: 1933
: any of several arts of combat and self-defense (as karate and judo) that
are widely practiced as sport
- martial artist noun

The...art of combat?  How is that an interpretation?  If I stab you with a
knife...that's not combat?  (Now...that's not necessarily artistic,
either...but it can be.)

Now...surely, there's nothing spectacularly artistic about blowing someone
up with a rocket launcher.  But you talk as if fencing were less artistic
than just using one's own body.  I contest that someone using a
hand-to-hand weapon to full effect must be equally artistic and fit
physically.  Even your vaunted dictionary.com gives a similar definition,
IN ADDITION to the one that specifies weaponless combat:

"Any of several Asian arts of combat or self-defense, such as aikido,
karate, judo, or tae kwon do, usually practiced as sport. Often used in
the plural."

However...what you fail to see...is that WEAPONLESS COMBAT, or however you
choose to term it...is a contradictory statement.  Why?  Because your
hands, feet, elbows, knees, forehead, whatever...guess what?  They're
weapons.  Any device you use to cause harm to someone else, be it a part
of your own body or else is a weapon.

Now, I agree that guns and rocket launchers...are questionable.  But the
word ART...that implies study and discipline.  Swordplay, staffwork,
nunchakus...they require a LOT of study and discipline for effective use -
just as much study and discipline as someone using just their hands.  It's
combatative...it's martial, and it's an art.

It's your opinion that the words don't mean what they mean.  It's also my
opinion that beef doesn't come from cows.  It comes from the laser printer
in the library.

Damn, now I'm hungry.  (Not to say that Chico's Taco's can be positively
identified as beef...)


Leona writes:
> According to my SiFu, you gotta attack as fast as you
> can w/o hesitating and that you can never win by just
> defending... so basically, I guess don't give your
> opponent any time to act.

Tell your SiFu that I used the high defense technique offense quite a bit
during sparring matches in high school, and I did just fine.  You just
put plenty of power into those two or three punches/kicks and put them at
the right points on the body, and the fight is over.  Let your opponent
get tired and frustrated while you dodge or block, wait for the
hesitation or the slightly misbalanced attack (from rushing through
attacks too much), BAM, repeat from step one.

Of course, that technique only works if you're just plain hard to hit, and
that was always my advantage.  That and the muay thai my brothers taught
me. *smirk*


David Trest:
> since I've only seen the anime and the B&W comic(Not the manga, the
> comic was put out by Viz Video)

Uh...the B&W comic IS THE MANGA.  Look at the artist and writer in those
shiny covered comics that Viz releases.  Whoa!  It's Rumiko Takahashi!  A
coincidence?  Could Viz POSSIBLY have a completely different Rumiko
Takahashi working for them, writing a different comic than the Rumiko
Takahashi who works for Shonen Sunday...using the same characters?  Or
could it just be that those books from Viz are drawn and penned by Rumiko
Takahashi at Shonen Sunday are simply republications with all that pesky
Japanese text removed from the speech bubbles and English translations in
place of them?

Whoa...you mean they can translate Japanese literature?  Man...I love this
whole 21st century concept!  (Although...the monks were pulling the same
gag back in the Middle Ages, but who remembers stuff like that?)



Okay...that should be enough sarcasm to last through November.  See you
all again when I have enough time for a FBAMR.

Damn...I want some Chico's Tacos.

J. Shouryu Nohe
Grad Assistant, New Mexico State University
Still the Professor of Sarcasm
"I think we have a ghost in our house." - Kaycee Nicole
"I should probably be playing Buffet." - Steve Moore