Okay, anyone speak Japanese?...please, no need to smack me all at once for
asking that one...  Maybe you can help me out then, how do you say the
following in Japanese? (phonetic aids where you think it would be
helpful),

1. "I have no Idea what you just said." 

2. "I live to serve."

3. "Your wish is my command."

4. "When I clap my hands you will become very sleepy..."

5. "When you wake up you will be under my control..."

6. "Now bark like a dog."

Trust me, you don't wan't to know...it's part of my master plan
D4...really top secret stuff...heh heh heh...