>From: Brian Welch [bwelchz7@yahoo.com]

Good improvements. See, I told you it was no problem to post it as one
article.

>2D.  WHAT IS THE DEMONS' COMPUTER SYSTEM?
>Perhaps, then, Nidhog goes through Yggdrasil when a demon performs magic?

I don't think so. If Nidhog needed to go through Yggdrasil for demons to
perform magic, then it would be all too easy for the gods to abort any magic
that might be harmful to their interests. If any such links existed, they
are likely to be covert.

>If so, this might explain why demons are not allowed to hack Yggdrasil

Not Yggdrasil, but the Time Control System specifically.

>How difficult are spells?
>The most powerful spells must be sung and have many, sometimes hundreds of,
parts which must be sung simultaneously.

Not simultaneously but in step or 'in tune'.

>3E.  WHAT ARE SEALS AND HOW DO THEY WORK?

I think you should not have discussed seals and limiters in the same section
and certainly not using the same word.

>4A.  WHEN CAN A GODDESS ACQUIRE AN ANGEL?
>Normally, before a goddess is allowed to acquire an angel egg, she must
first demonstrate that she is sufficiently powerful to control an angel.

Lose this first sentence and replace it with the second paragraph of this
section. More straightforward that way.

>4B.  HOW POWERFUL ARE ANGELS?

This is speculation on my part, but I think a goddess divides her power if
she 'splits' and multiplies it if she uses her angel.
For example, say Bell were to cast magic that used 10% of her available
power. If she were to use Holybell, they would each use only 5% power to
achieve the same effect, halving Bell's power requirements. Therefore,
Holybell could double Bell's power if both used 100% power and Rind could
triple hers with both angels out.

>When an angel is forcibly removed from its host the process is so
physically and psychologically painful that the host is rendered unconscious
for a considerable period of time.

More like comatose until the angel is returned.

>It is clear that once a goddess has bonded with her angel she doesn't want
another.

It might be safer to say 'it is almost certain that'

>It also requires considerable self discipline to manifest 2 angels
simultaneously.

It seems that the goddess has to really, really need (like from the bottom
of her heart kind of thing) both angels' strength to get them to manifest
together. Otherwise it would be like shifting her attention from one angel
to the other, causing the first to receed while the other manifested.
Inferring from this, manifesting 3 angels at once could be exponentially
more difficult than 2. This could imply that goddess with multiple angels
are likely rare or nonexistent in Heaven.

>In one case the angels are apparently twins hatched from the same egg

I'd suggest 'possibly' instead of 'apparently'

>which can be implanted into an unconscious and angel-less goddess

'Angel deprived' would be more accurate.

This is better than previous. But the lack of spoilers makes it feel rather
vague. If you were to make this a web page, you could add a link to each
section that supplied detailed evidence of who, what, when, where and how.